Forgiveness

Forgiveness

Someone close to me was cheated on and he broke up with his girlfriend because of it only to take her back a few months later. I was talking to his brother about it and expressed my anger over how he could take her back; I said that I could never forgive her for what she did to him. He replied by saying that he felt the same way too until he realized that her crime was against his brother, not him, and that if his brother could forgive her for cheating on him then so should he. The reason for that is she didn't cheat on him, she cheated on his brother. Oh, how that put things into perspective. I found that I was able to forgive her myself because of that and come to find what a wonderful woman she truly is, but that she simply made a mistake. What I learned is this: that we should be able to forgive if the person who was wronged was able to forgive. If someone sins against you then I should be able to forgive them if you are; but here's the rub: all sin ultimately goes against God. Whatever transgressions are brought about towards me, I know that truly they are transgressions towards God, they just affect me. For example, if someone treats me with malice then they fail to obey God's command of loving our neighbors as ourselves. I am merely affected by their sin against God, not being sinned against myself. On a philosophical side, Plato talks about the Good. God, as the greatest conceivable being, is the essence of goodness or all good; God is the Good. To do evil is to be in opposition to the Good, it is a blatant offense towards the Good. So to do wrong by anyone is ultimately an offense against the Good, God. And here's the beauty of that: God has already forgiven any and all transgressions, we just simply need to accept His payment. "In Him we have redemption through His blood, the forgiveness of our trespasses, according to the riches of His grace." (Ephesians‬ ‭1‬:‭7‬ NASB) So if God is the one who was truly wronged by one's sin and yet He has forgiven them, how much more should we desire to forgive them as well? How foolish would I be to not forgive when God has already done so; it would be like not forgiving someone cheating on a loved one when that loved one has already forgiven them. God has forgiven them just as He has forgiven us, we therefore should forgive them as well. That's why Paul says "be kind to one another, tender-hearted, forgiving each other, just as God in Christ also has forgiven you." (‭Ephesians‬ ‭4‬:‭32‬ NASB) As the doctrine of imputed righteousness affirms, we are given the righteousness of Christ. So that even as we are sinning, God still sees His own righteousness when looking upon us. Our sins have permanently been paid for by the Son, and therefore we are forever in right-standing with the Father. We have been forgiven an enormous debt, we should be able to then forgive others when they have any debt toward us. Jesus says "For this reason the kingdom of heaven may be compared to a king who wished to settle accounts with his slaves. When he had begun to settle them, one who owed him ten thousand talents was brought to him. But since he did not have the means to repay, his lord commanded him to be sold, along with his wife and children and all that he had, and repayment to be made. So the slave fell to the ground and prostrated himself before him, saying, 'Have patience with me and I will repay you everything.' And the lord of that slave felt compassion and released him and forgave him the debt. But that slave went out and found one of his fellow slaves who owed him a hundred denarii; and he seized him and began to choke him, saying, 'Pay back what you owe.' So his fellow slave fell to the ground and began to plead with him, saying, 'Have patience with me and I will repay you.' But he was unwilling and went and threw him in prison until he should pay back what was owed. So when his fellow slaves saw what had happened, they were deeply grieved and came and reported to their lord all that had happened. Then summoning him, his lord said to him, 'You wicked slave, I forgave you all that debt because you pleaded with me. Should you not also have had mercy on your fellow slave, in the same way that I had mercy on you?' And his lord, moved with anger, handed him over to the torturers until he should repay all that was owed him. My heavenly Father will also do the same to you, if each of you does not forgive his brother from your heart." (‭Matthew‬ ‭18‬:‭23-35‬ NASB) Similarly Jesus when teaching the disciples how to pray said this, "Pray, then, in this way: 'Our Father who is in heaven, Hallowed be Your name. 'Your kingdom come. Your will be done, On earth as it is in heaven. 'Give us this day our daily bread. 'And forgive us our debts, as we also have forgiven our debtors. 'And do not lead us into temptation, but deliver us from evil. [ For Yours is the kingdom and the power and the glory forever. Amen.' ] For if you forgive others for their transgressions, your heavenly Father will also forgive you. But if you do not forgive others, then your Father will not forgive your transgressions. (‭Matthew‬ ‭6‬:‭9-15‬ NASB) How can we know the lengths to which we have been forgiven and yet then not forgive ourselves? To do so, quite simply, is to have another god in our life other than the one, true God. We place something or someone else as a god in our hearts (idolatry).  For if we have Him as Lord then we obey His commandments (John 14:15) and He has commanded us to forgive (Matthew 18:21-22). Not to mention that if God were truly Lord then we would be able to forgive since He has forgiven us and we know that any wrong done to us is first done to Him. "If the world hates you, you know that it has hated Me before it hated you... Remember the word that I said to you, 'A slave is not greater than his master.' If they persecuted Me, they will also persecute you; if they kept My word, they will keep yours also. But all these things they will do to you for My name's sake, because they do not know the One who sent Me. (‭John‬ ‭15‬:‭18, 20-21‬ NASB) The truth then is that by not forgiving ____ (fill in the blank) we are then placing ____ over God. We are not giving God the ultimate authority in our life, we are not giving Him reign, and we are not living in Him. That is why the Bible so explicitly affirms that if we do not forgive then our sins will not be forgiven, because as we saw in the Ephesians 1:7 verse our forgiveness is through the redemptive blood of Jesus Christ. So if we do not forgive, we place something over Him as lord in our lives. And if we do not have Him as the Lord of our lives, then we deny His redemption. But to live in Christ is to live in right-standing with God, knowing the immeasurable debt He has forgiven us, and because of this knowledge, being able to freely forgive the minuscule crimes committed against ourselves. I shall close then how John closed his first epistle: "And we know that the Son of God has come, and has given us understanding so that we may know Him who is true; and we are in Him who is true, in His Son Jesus Christ. This is the true God and eternal life. Little children, guard yourselves from idols." (‭1 John‬ ‭5‬:‭20-21‬ NASB)